Saturday, January 24, 2009

There are a lot of things happening around here that I am not blogging about.
When I start thinking about how or what to say it seems so complicated that I just give up. Life is different than it used to be. So many things have changed. Other things are soon to change. I know this sounds silly. I just don't want to put it all in writing. I wish I could just sit down with a friend and talk but most of the friends that I would actually talk to aren't here. Or I'm not there...whichever way you want to see it. I have asked God every question I can think of and for now He isn't answering. So, I'm going alone through the days and weeks, wondering, watching, waiting, worrying :)

I'd like to think that my past experience in walking with God has given me the ability to trust and believe and know that God is walking me through this difficult time and soon I will come out victorious in my christian life and be able to share about God's faithfulness. But, the truth is I am baffled and bewildered and bereft.

Sometimes, the only thing I do know is what is happening today. I know that today God has provided us with food, clothes, a car that runs and a warm house. I know that God is listening even if I can't hear Him. I know this time will pass.... I just don't know when. And I know that for today....that is enough.

3 comments:

Rebecca Conduff Aguirre said...

Isn't life a continual challenge?! So sorry to hear that you are having a rough time of it...while not knowing the details, I will be praying for peace and a sense of God's presence.

Blessings. Becky

Kara said...

Hey Cindy,
I sent you and email on Friday night. I am wondering if you got it. If you have a different email address, can you please let me know.
love, betty tibberts

Jeanie said...

I'm sorry dear friend! I understand the frustration and fear. All this just brings me back to me knees. I love you!

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